Teens in Chronic Pain

In this blog, I have openly discussed my struggles with chronic pain, its impact on my faith, and my fight to get approval for a necessary surgery by my insurance company. After being denied by Blue Cross Blue Shield of Michigan three times, I took my case to the external insurance review board. I submitted letters from my orthopedic surgeon and physical therapist as well as studies showing the effectiveness of the surgery I need and other relevant documents. BCBS also gave the board their documents. The board then looks at all of the information and makes a decision (usually siding with the insurance company). After waiting 10 weeks past when I should have heard, I learned this evening that the board denied my request to reverse the insurance company’s decision.

What does that mean? I have no other avenues to turn to in terms of getting insurance to cover my surgery. As a result, I must raise $30,000 in the next 11 months if I want to have surgery next summer. Fortunately that’s a solid chunk of time, but it’s also a ton of money that needs to be raised. And I have a feeling people would be more receptive to financially assisting me if I was fighting a more serious problem like cancer, but it’s just a knee surgery and chronic pain is a more invisible health problem. Because of that, only my friends, family, and coworkers would truly understand the role pain plays in my life whereas the average bystander would look at me and likely see nothing wrong because I don’t openly showcase my pain (unless it’s a really bad day and I have to limp).

Yes, I cried tonight after learning the bad news. However, I’m determined to keep a positive attitude about it. If this surgery and the timing of next summer is truly God’s will and not just my desire, I will be able to get the $30,000. As such, I am completely putting my trust in God because I obviously don’t have $30,000 just sitting around. Hopefully, it will be very exciting to see what God has in store for me over the next 11 months and how I’m able to raise $30,000 (if that, in fact, happens).

Here are some verses I will be focusing on as I continue to pray and believe:

Ephesians 6:18 - Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.

Matthew 21:22 - You can pray for anything, and if you have faith, you will receive it.

Romans 4:20-21 - Abraham never wavered in believing God’s promise. In fact, his faith grew stronger, and in this he brought glory to God. 21 He was fully convinced that God is able to do whatever he promises.

What do these verses tell me? Through prayer, I am joining my heart with His. I need to pray simply and wholeheartedly. I must pray because I believe it and expect God to fulfill his promises.

I am a well-organized individual who is goal-oriented and has experiences with fundraising. In addition, I’ve interned in public relations so I will hopefully be able to market and promote my fundraising efforts well. This goal of $30,000 will allow me to flex my creative muscles for the most important fundraising efforts of my life and I already have ideas streaming through my head. I will continue to post here with thoughts on chronic pain, but I will also document my effort to raise this large sum of money.

Today I learned that my insurance company, Blue Cross Blue Shield of Michigan, denied my request for a medial meniscus transplant for the third time. The first two attempts were done via letter and the most recent attempt was a half hour in-person conference on February 14th. They apparently sent a letter the first weekend of spring break notifying me that they decided to deny my request once again. My mom and dad decided not to tell me until today when I stopped by my parent’s house on my way back to Ann Arbor from working in Detroit.

My parents gave me the three paged letter saying that I was denied again and that I had two more options: appeal to an external insurance board or a civil lawsuit. We don’t know which step we will be taking next as we want to make sure that if we appeal to the board, that won’t eliminate the option to file a civil lawsuit if I’m denied once again.

I don’t think I’ve ever felt this blessed and disappointed at the same time before. This morning, I had an absolutely amazing day at work and got to do some things no other Red Wings interns had gotten to do yet this year and I was in such a fantastic mood. I have been blessed with the gift of an internship that I absolutely love. But I’ve also been blessed with amazing family. My parents told me that they would do whatever it takes to get this surgery whether it’s appealing to the external board review, filing a civil lawsuit, or paying for the surgery themselves if all that falls through and my dad said he’d even be willing to sell his beloved ‘63 Corvette to help pay for my surgery (now that’s love!).

If my family ends up having to pay for it, money will be incredibly tight and we will all have to make some sacrifices. But I’m 21 years old with arthritis. I can’t stand or walk without pain. And biking, swimming, and using the elliptical are completely out of the question. If the other avenues fall through, I would have to wait 20+ years before I would be old enough for a knee replacement. And that’s why my parents are willing to make huge financial sacrifices to pay for that surgery. Hopefully, it will not get to that point because I don’t want to be a strain on my family and their budget.

Between the support of my family and all of my friends (including the many of you have sent words of support over the last month), I feel so incredibly blessed. At the same time, I feel so disappointed. It has been a very emotionally draining experience and it has now been almost four years since I first knew I needed this operation. I want so badly to be able to walk and stand with little to no pain that it is disappointing when you see insurance deny you this request three times. But I know that God has a wonderful plan for me so I will choose to focus on the blessings in my life rather than the disappointments.

“I will praise You in this storm…”
- Casting Crowns