Jun 01 2006
You know you’ve been on crutches too long when you…
You know you’ve been on crutches too long when… [as compiled by myself and others on the KneeGeeks forum!] There were more than those listed below, but I chose only those applicable to me.
1) People are surprised to see you without them
2) Your arm muscles are in the best shape ever
3) You use them like chopsticks and don’t have to bend over to pick something up
4) You have developed calluses right below your armpits and on your palms
5) You decorate your crutches for special occassions (ie. green and red ribbons for Christmas)
6) You have friends/co-workers/teachers sign them because you can get more messages/autographs than any cast!
7) You crutch faster than you walk
8) Strangers always marvel at your speed and agility on crutches
9) You dream of “pimping” out your crutches (ie. adding rhimestones and color)
10) You’ve learned to dance on them (or in my case, when you’ve gone to two Homecoming dances on them and with an immobilizer)
11) People call you gimpy because you are never without them (all my high school friends called me Gimpy)
12) You wish you could use the crutches because they help with pain, but your OS (orthopedic surgeon) won’t let you because your quads atrophy too much
13) Your friends get bummed when you don’t have the crutches because they can’t play “crutch and field 2004″ and use the crutches to pole vault over couches, etc.
14) It’s easier to push your way through a crowd because you can just hit people. This was great in crowded high school hallways.
15) It becomes a good luck charm on your high school track team.
16) When, as a senior in high school, friends can’t remember you ever off of them even though your freshman year was the only year you never used them.
17) You look at them and feel at home.
18) You absolutely have no problem opening doors or stopping them from closing much to the amazement of friends and family.
19) You get sad when your PT or OS tells you to wean yourself down to one crutch because it slows you down.